Tag Archives: Mike Ashley is a fat bastard

My manifesto to save football from itself

Posted on 31/01/2022 by Wichita Lineman Was A Song I Once Heard

It’s fitting that a significant section of society and its institutions should begin to emulate the behaviour of the government it elected. Still, while too many did, most didn’t vote for Boris Johnson. And no wonder, even before being elected … Continue reading →

Posted in Sports | Tagged Alexandre Gaydamak is a thief, An optimist pessimist and fatalist walk in to a bar, Arsenal, Aston Villa, before acting impulsively. Take Everton, Boris Johnnson, Brucie Bonus, Bundesliga, Cheating, Chelsea, Chris Wood £25m!, Commie, Coronavirus, Derby County, European Super League, Everton, Farhad Moshiri is clueless, FIFA, HMRC, Journalese clichés, Juventus, Leicester City, Liverpool, Manchester City, Manchester United, Mike Ashley is a fat bastard, Newcastle United, Omricon, Premier League, Professional sycophant Mike Riley, Shredding your prostate, Siriacha sauce, Spurs being Spurs, Sugar daddies, Sustainability, Trophy for finishing fourth in The Championship, VAR | Leave a comment

The Premier League Quarterly Report 2015/16 – The Half-Way Point

Posted on 10/01/2016 by Wichita Lineman Was A Song I Once Heard

Like Groundhog Day, I’m repeating myself in these Premier League columns, regurgitating the same thought, but, alas, it’s true – the Premier League continues to decline at an alarming rate. Superficially obfuscating this is its immense wealth and a delusional … Continue reading →

Posted in Sports | Tagged Arsenal, Arsenal for the League?, Aston Villa, Benteke is bollocks, Bill Murray, Bojan Krkic, Bournemouth, Cheslea, Crystal Palace, Everton, Groundhog Day, I miss Tim Sherwood, Jurgen Klopp will soon need another hair transplant, Kyle Walker & Danny Rose - the 21st century Chuckle Brothers, Leicester City, Liverpool, Louis Van Gaal's face is melting, Manchester City, Manchester United, Mike Ashley is a fat bastard, Mourinho on the dole, Newcastle United, Norwich City, Odion Ighalo, Pep Guardiola to Swansea City, Remi (with an 'I') Garde, Southampton, Stoke City, Sunderland, Swansea City, The Half-Way point, The Premier League Quarterly Report, Tony Pulis is the abyss of humanity, Too many tags lad!, Tottenham Hotspur, Watford, West Bromwich Albion, West Ham United, You've just been Shane Longed | 1 Comment

The 2015/16 Premier League Preview

Posted on 06/08/2015 by Wichita Lineman Was A Song I Once Heard

So here we go again, another Premier League season is about to begin. Usually this should induce a feeling of excitement as football’s one of the few things that manages to make the uncertain and uncertainty that is the future … Continue reading →

Posted in Sports | Tagged Alan Pardew is a genius at getting high class escorts to his pad, American sports are shit and so are their owners, Arsenal, Aston Villa, Bournemouth, Chelsea, Crystal Palace, Everton, If you have a life - don't read this, Jose Mourinho is a twatcunt, Leicester City, Liverpool, Manchester City, Manchester United, Mike Ashley is a fat bastard, Newcastle United, Norwich City, Ponzi Schemes, Premier League 2015/16, Premier League Preview, Southampton, Stoke City, Sunderland, Swansea City, The 2015/16 Premier League Preview, Tony Pulis is an artist, Tottenham Hotspur, Watford, West Bromwich Albion, West Ham United, Word count: 9121 (I must be mad) | 1 Comment

Relegation Day

Posted on 21/05/2015 by Wichita Lineman Was A Song I Once Heard

When it comes to the last weekend of the Premier League season it would be better if the title was on the line, but a relegation scrap is a passable consolation prize. Its appeal is both engrossing and macabre, akin … Continue reading →

Posted in Sports | Tagged 11th September attacks, Alan Pardew is a genius, Aston Villa, Burnley, Chris Hughton, Geoff 'cuntface' Shreeves, Greg Dyke = daft twat, Hull City, James McArthur you aren't safe mate, Joe Kinnear, John Carver, Leicester City, Let's all laugh at Alan Shearer's management career, Manchester United, Michael Dawson has played for England, Mike Ashley is a fat bastard, Money money money, Mortal Kombat X, Newcastle United, Nigel Pearson moonlights as a serial killer, Premier League, QPR, Relegation, Relegation Day, Snake Plissken would escape from the Championship, Steve Bruce, Steve Bruce's fat head, Sunderland, Tactics Tim Sherwood will manage a team in the FA cup final, West Ham United | 1 Comment